Single life living...
So I've been thinking lately that it would be nice to meet someone so why not look around see what my options are. A friend at work said "Ashley you have to try this new dating website, you just swipe through pictures and if you like someone click on there picture". I don't consider my self desperate and that I have to get married RIGHT NOW! I'm fine being single and I'm happy with my life. Would I love to be married, of course I would. Would I have liked to have been married years ago, maybe. I will admit I very choosy and extremely picky. Marriage is a one time deal for me and I want to have the right man the first time. I know what I'm looking for and what I want out of life. I also know what I don't want. I hope whoever I end up with will want those same things. I don't want someone to settle for me nor do I want to be the settler! A lady asked me once that at my age can I really afford to be so picky. I said heck yeah I can. I told her being alone to me would be a hole heck of a lot better than being unhappy for eternity. I used to have a big old huge list of everything I wanted my future husband to be. I get a really good laugh out of that list now. It is so superficial and quite sad. If I could go back and tell the younger me that he doesn't have to have a six pack, he doesn't have to make millions, he doesn't have to be the most romantic man ever and that my friends don't all have to love him. Haha still makes me laugh and the things we once thought were so important. If I made a list now it would go something like this...I want a man that is happy and that we both strive everyday to make each other happy. I want some one that loves his family but is willing to our family first. I want someone that is responsible. I want someone that is honest with me and someone that can be totally honest without being mean. I want someone who has a job and doesn't mind working. I want someone who can do his own thing and be happy that I can do the same. I want someone who shares all responsibilities with me. I want someone who is kind to the less fortunate and kind to people who are disabled. Someone who goes out of there way to hold a door open for the elderly. I want some one who stops for squirrels and doesn't speed up to hit them. I want someone who is faithful in my church. I want him to put God first in all things because I believe if he does that everything else just falls into place. I don't want my kids grandpa to have to bless them or baptize them so I want him to be worthy to do that. I want someone who will pay there tithing before they buy there latest wish. I want someone who doesn't make fun of you for your short falls but that encourages you to be your best but still loves you if you slip. I want to laugh and be happy. When we fight and we will, I don't want him to get mad in front of others especially family. I want him to kiss me when he leaves to go somewhere and when he gets back. I want a family however that comes and I want a man who wants that too. I don't want him to be perfect because I am far from that. I want him to expect these same things from me. I would be the ultimate liar if I said I didn't want him to be attractive. I don't care if he has one or three chins as long as he can teach our boys to play baseball and dance with his daughter. I would love if he could grow a beard because I like them. I would like him to be affectionate and loving. It would help if he could spell because I'm rubbish at it! But if not we can be the happiest spell checkers together! I think of all the things I would like now compared to what I though I wanted and I'm lucky I didn't go with that list because I wouldn't have been happy in the long run. I'm a people watcher. I watch my family's and friends relationships and think I don't want that or I'm not going to do that. I often think oh cute I want to do that or that was so sweet I hope I can find that. I'm often surprised at what comes out of people's mouths sometime when talking about "older" single people. I have heard there must be something wrong with them, well they must have issues, and well it's no wonder that can't get a date. A branch president said once, well he wants Barbie but he is no Ken. It's so easy to judge and try to guess why we're not married yet. Not speaking for everyone but I think most of us just haven't found our person yet. I asked a lady who was giving me a hard time about not being married if she was happy in her relationship. She told me of course she was. I said I want that too and I'm willing to wait till I can find him. My mom traveled the ocean to get my dad and sometimes the best things are things that don't come easy. I love my friend who says what's the matter with men, can't they see how great you are. I love her but I don't think there's anything the matter with men. I think they are just trying to find what they want and that's great too. I guess the reason I got on my not so little single soap box was because I did go on this website and did a little swiping through pictures. What got me was reading the profiles. So many made me laugh so hard and think oh buddy your giving us singles a bad name. One man said he wanted someone to take care of his kids. One man was kissing a woman in his picture. The one that got me the most was a larger man now I say this not just because of weight. I have never been 100 pounds and don't judge people because of weight. I would like to lose some more and if a man is larger great with me more to love and snuggle with. Any way back to this larger man. In his profile he said he wasn't active and liked to stay home. That's fine be yourself whatever but here's where I started laughing. He wants a beautiful woman who is very healthy and active in sports. He said that it didn't have to be the most important thing to her but she had to have those qualities. Hehe good luck champ. One thing I have learned that if you want a six pack man you better have a bikini body yourself. But I wish him the best and hope he finds what he's looking for. As I enjoy a doughnut because I am a woman and I think we need curves I will swipe to the next man. Do I enjoy dating? No. Is it fun to put yourself out there? No. Is it all going to be worth it? It sure as heck better be:) My friend said when his sister was talking about wanting to be an 8 cow woman. Haha rude but funny, he said get real at this point we will take the hoof and the tail. My brother wanted to put me in the ad in that paper saying single woman with brother who owns a drift boat and will take you out fishing. My other brother said just go up to buy-I you'll be snatched up in a week! While all this advice that we receive from family and friends is with good loving intentions let's be honest sometime we don't want to keep hearing it! Some day my prince will come and I'll probably go back and read this post and get a laugh. What I won't do is give dating advice right after I get married or for a very long long time maybe ever because chances are they won't want to hear it either:)
P.S. men for real women will completely swipe past you if you are kissing a woman in a picture. Listing all 5 of your children and saying you've never been married just looking for a good time. Well buddy seems you've already had 5 good times, we don't want to be baby momma number 6. Last but not least do not put what size bra you want her to have...signed all single women everywhere!!!!
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